aka Beric Dondarrion

  • I live in San Francisco
  • My occupation is Wikian
  • I am what I am
  • Porterfield

    Conan in 2D, Please

    August 19, 2011 by Porterfield

    "Believe me or don't, but don't say I didn't warn you. I actually took the glasses off half an hour into the movie and, while blurry, it was a vast improvement." - Sheenan87 (IMDb)

    Of course I don't always believe things I read on the internet, especially when it involves reviewing movies, books, bars, restaurants, etc., but the above quote is almost unanimously reinforced. Every comment I've seen about the new Conan movie, which came out today, mentions the poor use of 3D. In my last blog post, I briefly mentioned that I was unimpressed with the use of 3D in recent years, but I wrongly assumed that Conan would be palpable in the format, seeing as it's an action movie about a barbarian smashing heads. Let the blood fly, right? Wrong.

    I instiā€¦

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  • Porterfield

    If you've ever wanted to see those fantasies inside your head turned into a 3D summer blockbuster, the history of Conan is your best guide. The Conan remake hits theaters this Friday, August 19th, and if Robert E. Howard were still alive, he would be blown away. The advancements of cinema technology would probably freak him out, but he would also break down in tears watching his Cimmeria come to life (in 3D!). Then again, the way 3D movies have been going lately, maybe it wouldn't be a good idea to show the remake to zombie Robert E. Howard. He might eat himself. We're better off letting him read the comics! Anyway, I've turned the abridged history of Conan into a guide for your own box office success. Hopefully you don't have the impatienā€¦

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